Yet despite the increased risk, not all children of domestic violence become batterers or tolerate abuse. Children react to their environment in several different ways. The following are four factors that help determine childrenŐs response to abuse:

The interpretation of the experience

How they have learned to survive and cope with stress

The availability of support people (friends, relatives, other adults
Their ability to accept support and assistance from adults
F A C T S
  • 80% of runaway are from abusive homes
  • Young criminal offenders are four times more likely to come from abusive homes.
  • 63% of all boys, age 11-20 arrested for homicide, have killed their mother’s assaulter.
  • Frequently there is both child abuse and domestic violence in the same house.
  • Children in these homes are six times more likely to attempt suicide
  • Children from these homes have a 74% greater chance of committing crimes against others.
  • They are also 24 times more likely to commit rape.
  • Children from abusive homes are 1000 times more likely to abuse their spouse/batterer of their own children

Additionally, childrenŐs responses differ with age and gender. Younger children in an abusive environment, including those used as pawns by perpetrators in custody and visitations disputes, have a tendency to regress in their development of behavioral skills. Male children, when frustrated, are frequently aggressive or throw temper tantrums. Females, by contrast, are inclined to withdraw, be passive, or became anxious.

Effects on Children

CHILDREN OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
 

Children, regardless of whether they have experienced abuse directly, are affected by violence in the home. Children who witness abuse display the same emotional responses as children who have been physically and emotionally abused.

Abusive behavior is learned behavior. At an early age, children raised in an abusive environment may develop patterns in their conduct that mimic the types of behavioral characteristics of batterers and victims. The lessons they learn from experiencing or observing abuse accompany them into adulthood. As adults, females often develop male distrust, negative attitudes toward, and/or accept violence or other forms of abuse as natural. Some males (though many will have intervened on a least one occasion to stop the abuse) identify increasingly with the batterer and adopt many of the same beliefs about women, sex roles, and the use of control tactics.

Children of domestic violence stand a greater chance of experiencing neglect.

Depression, fear, frustration, helplessness, and anger may serve as obstacles for some battered women who are trying to foster nurturing relationships with their children. After having had their foundation destroyed by domestic abuse, children from abusive households find it difficult to develop trust, self-confidence, or positive self-images. They often become ambivalent and desensitized to abuse. Many times the children’s initial sympathy for the victims eventually wanes out of disrespect. This occurs especially in cases when defensive measures taken by the victim are not apparent to the children. Children from domestic violent households are at greater risk of becoming the next generation of abusers.